1st January, 2014
Bahamas
Moffy
"N...No. You take care of your girl..."
The tear tracks on my face get worse each day. Even when I'm not crying, they are still there. Like a new feature that now has a permanent place on my skin, running straight from the corners of my eyes, over the high bones of my cheeks and down into the corners of my mouth. They live there in his memory. This is how I honour him and remember him. It’s all I can do.
"You take care of your girl. Marry her… Or so help me God.”
His voice rings through my ears every second of every day. I'd never noticed how soothing it was. In fact, I'd never noticed much about Scott before that night. Not in any great detail. He was Ethan's best friend, his right hand man, the guy who had supported him through everything since opening his club. He was kind, loyal, dependable, the backbone of Ethan's success as a businessman. All those things, I knew...
"You take care of your girl. Marry her… Or so help me God… I will kill you."
But there were other things about him I hadn't seen. His quiet, undeniable charm. The way the whites of his eye sparkled like no other person’s I'd ever seen before. The permanent look of happiness he always wore whenever he was around his best friend. The way he commanded people’s attention without even trying. The size of his heart, the way he loved, the fact that his selflessness knew no bounds. None at all. It took him taking his own life, to save us, for me to see that.
God, how I wish I could have seen that sooner.
What I would give to tell him how much I loved him, how much I still love him and how much I will never, ever stop.
If he was here now, I would hold him tight and I would never let go. I would tell him that, without him, Ethan would be nothing and I would be even less. I would beg him to let us ride in that car alone. I would tell him to find a woman to love, one who is worthy of his adoration and one who will make him happy. I would tell him all this, because I would know that he needed to hear it. And I didn't have long left to say it.
As I stare at myself in the bathroom mirror of our hotel room, I watch the silent tears continue to pour down my face.
His last words to us ring out loud in my ears, louder than you can possibly imagine. He’s all I’ve heard since we ran from the car. I’m not sure I will ever stop hearing his voice. The flashback of that night invades my vision all at once for the millionth time this week, and suddenly, I’m back in the field, surrounded by deathly darkness and the air of smoke.
"N..No. You take care of your girl. Marry her… or so help me God… I will kill you," he says in a strangled voice, his eyes rolling back and fluttering before he scrunches them tight in agony at the branch that has ripped through his chest.
“You bet your arse I’m going to marry her, and you’re going to be there to witness it. So help me God,” Ethan cries out, his voice lodged in his throat. His eyes catch sight of the object in Scott’s hand and the slow register of what it is creeps across his face, his panic shifting to anger in an instant. “What the fuck are you doing? What have you got there?”
Scott holds the lighter in his palm, rubbing the surface with his thumb as his head drops back on the seat. The blood continues to seep from his punctured chest, his face already looking ghostly as he tries to speak through barely moving lips. “Ethan, take Izzy and run or we will all die.” His eyes close as though the pain is simply too much for him to bear. “Petr… every...where… go.”
The overwhelming grief of the moment winds me of breath entirely as I carefully reach for Ethan’s hand and tilt my head to one side. My eyes are full with unshed tears as he looks back at me with nothing but pure helplessness strewn across his face.
“Please.” I whisper my plea, failing to control the sudden trembling of my bottom lip. “Save him… Please.”
Ethan’s empty gaze seems to stare right through me for the longest time and I know the thoughts that are racing through his head. Somehow, without any of us intending it to happen, he’s being forced to choose a life, just like they always wanted him to. I want to reach out and hold him, to tell him to save Scott and let me go. I pray and beg to every God I can think of for them to turn the clock back to just moments ago and take me instead, but it’s not enough. Nothing is ever going to be enough. Ethan slowly turns back to his friend as the emotion clogs in his throat. “Don’t do this, Scott. Please…”
Scott weakly lifts his head and I watch as the silent tears begin to pour down his face as his eyes flicker between the two of us. If I ever had any doubt about him loving either of us before now, the look in his eyes in this moment crushes it. I can see it there. He’s not even thinking about himself or the fact that he’s living the last moments of his life, taking his last breaths. All he’s thinking about is us.
Inhaling a small amount of air sharply, he weakly lifts his right arm and holds the lighter higher in the air. My eyes widen in pure terror. There's petrol pissing out everywhere. The hood of the car is full of smoke already. One flick of that thing and the whole place goes up. My chin wobbles furiously, my head tilting to the side as I stare into Scott's eyes, silently pleading, begging him with all my life for him not to do this. All that stares back at me is determination.
"Five," he chokes.
Ethan’s hand slams on the hood of the car furiously, his voice an angry shout filled with terror. “Don’t you dare! I’m NOT leaving you!”
"Not… much choice. Four..." Scott’s eyes roll, a heavy breath escaping him as he tries to focus back on me. My control is shattered as I begin to sob silently and just stare into his eyes.
“I can’t! I just can’t! I can’t fucking… leave…” Ethan’s head snaps all around him in a panic as the hissing from the engine gets louder and louder. The smoke seems to get thicker, greyer and more threatening all at once.
"Four,” he repeats, his head rolling to one side as he struggles to stay in control of his body. His mind is closing down. I can feel him slipping away. “I fucking love you both,” he manages to whimper.
Ethan jumps out of the car in an instant. “NO!” he shouts. A loud growl of heartbreaking frustration erupts from him as he paces and tries to find a way to save us all. As much as I want to do the same, I know it’s already over, and all I can do is watch as he kicks the soil, bends down to the ground and falls apart crying. "I love you, too, mate. I'll never ever fucking forget this. Do you understand me? I… fuck!" His head drops to his chest in defeat whilst my heart shatters to a million pieces.
"I know, mate. Three.” His breath hitches quickly and he rushes out the next number in a hurry. “Two..." His finger hovers over the lighter as his head falls back limply, the last remnants of his life slowly leaving his already broken body.
Jumping to his feet, Ethan reaches inside his pocket and pulls out his sobriety medallion and takes one last chance on going back inside the car. His body blocks Scott from my line of sight and I take a moment to close my eyes and hope for some kind of miracle.
“You will live forever in my memories, you bastard. I fucking love you!” His voice breaks in a way I’ve never heard before as he slowly backs out of the car and that’s when I really know it’s over.
My whole body sags in pain because I know what's coming next. I know what's about to happen and there's not a thing I can do to stop it. My world feels like it's ending. The tears just keep on falling... Time, emotion, clarity… It's all gone. Everything's temporarily frozen. The disbelief of the moment allowing me a small reprieve of pain as it all goes numb.
Until the misery high wears off in an instant.
Ethan grabs me, his hand claiming mine in a death grip. “Baby, we gotta go.”
“No,” I gasp through the tears that have fallen on my lips. My head shakes slightly from side to side in a weak attempt to fight the inevitable. “We said we wouldn’t do this.”
His eyes lock on mine in one final plea for compliance and before I know it, we are moving hard and fast across the earth, the ground passing beneath our feet in a blur. I struggle to keep up. I struggle to focus on anything but the fact that our friend is dying behind us and we are running in the opposite direction. I want to tell him to stop. I want to shout that we have to go back, but I know I can't. Scott is about to blow the car and all I can think about is how much I need Ethan to get away from danger. I need him away from harm. The thought of him being hurt rips through me like an explosion and, suddenly, I'm charging along harder, faster, more determined than ever before. Each time my foot pounds against the floor, I bounce off it with more fight. Because if there's a chance of either of us dying, I'd rather it be me. I'd rather get him to safety and then hand myself over. I'll take the same route as Scott. I'll die in a heartbeat for this man. I'll take my last breath this very second if that's what keeps him safe.
Then I hear it: the bang.
Then I see it: the blinding flash of orange around us.
Then I feel it: the fact Scott has gone. For us.
He's done it all for us…
How can we possibly live with ourselves after this?
How?
The sharp inhale of breath snaps me out of my horrible memory. My eyes search themselves as I stare back in to my own reflection. I’m a ghost of what I once was. My face feels pale, even though it’s tanned from the Bahamas sun. The red around my eyes makes me look ill and my lips feel dry from all the vomiting I’ve been doing since his death. I figure the more pain I can subject the rest of my body to, the less I might feel the giant crack that’s torn straight through my heart.
The cuts and bruises of the accident are fading slowly and the guilt over my rapid healing is unbearable. I survived. Ethan survived. We get better and stronger every day.
Scott didn't. He never will. He died for us.
I grip the edge of the sink and try to focus on today, the first day of the New Year, as the tears start to fall over and over again. If this is how the rest of my life is going to feel, I would rather have gone with Scott, back in that car. But I couldn’t do that. I was selfish. I couldn’t leave the man I love. I just couldn’t do it.
Ethan sleeps in the next room, his weak mutterings of pain letting me know that he's having his own nightmare, right this very second. He's reliving that night the same way I am. I don't think either of us will ever stop.
Resting my palm against my chest to control my breathing, I catch sight of my engagement ring in the mirror; the dull lights of this confined room shining against it, making it sparkle brighter than I've ever seen it sparkle before. Like it's calling to me. Every twinkle it makes sings out to me in song. This single item of jewellery fitting on my finger like it's the only place it's ever belonged.
Swallowing harshly, my brow creases together as I hold it out in front of me, casting a quick glance between the ever-steady light on the ceiling before looking back down at the ring.
“You’re shining too brightly,” I whisper at it as though it can actually hear me.
In this moment, I’m not convinced it can’t.
It feels like something is taking over me as my chest swells with a heavy inhale. Suddenly the dark memories of what happened that night are being replaced with every happy memory I’ve ever shared with Ethan. Our first date, the first night he stayed over at Casa and the music that was played as we lay and held each other tight. The night we sat on the bonnet of his car, and looked out over Manchester, telling each other our histories. The nights out, the nights in, the light-hearted arguing and the heavy make-up sessions afterwards. I’m bombarded with images of his smile in every imaginable way. The night he asked me to move in with him, the day he came home from rehab. I can see it all. The engagement. Our wonderfully, perfect engagement.
His hands, his hair, his cheekbones, his bright, white smile, the tattoos upon his chest and back, his naked body pressed against mine… The pictures hit me hard, each one adding an ounce of fight back into my weak body.
"Ethan,” I breathe as I continue to stare at the engagement ring that sits upon my hand. The one that shouldn’t be twinkling so much in the dim light of the bathroom, but somehow is.
Then I see us both at Julia’s grave, the first time we went to see it together. Her name stares back at me and my chest beats faster and harder than ever before. My mouth hangs open in stunned silence
Before I know it, she’s gone and Scott's voice is in my head again, his last words playing out over and over again. Marry her… Marry her… Marry her.
And suddenly, I know what I have to do. I know what all this is about and what cruel path we’ve been lead on to get to this point.
"You don't play fair," I whisper as I look up and around the air as though it's filled with the people I love.
My hand reaches for my phone on the counter, my fingers shakily swiping the screen as I scroll and search for the number I need. Pressing it against my ear, I manage to take a deep breath and wait for answer.
"I need your help," I tell him softly after his groggy, half-asleep greeting.
"Mav?" Joel asks, his voice instantly thick with worry. “What’s wrong?”
“Everything. Nothing.”
He quickly clears his throat to try and sound more awake. “Where are you?”
"Do you believe in ghosts?” I ask, ignoring his question as I stare back at myself in the mirror.
"What?"
"Do you believe in ghosts?”
“I… don’t know,” he answers quietly.
“I do.”
“Okay,” he breathes into the mouthpiece, completely disorientated by my ramblings.
“I believe, Joel. And I think two may have just spoken to me louder than any living being ever has done before.”
I hear his confusion as he fumbles around in his hotel bed, shuffling up right as he speaks. "You're not making sense, Mav."
"I just need your help and I need it fast.”
“You don’t need to ask. I’m here for you. We both are. I’ll help you any way I can.”
Taking a deep breath, I feel a sense of right wash over me from the top of my head to the tips of my toes.
“I want to marry Ethan.” The silence at the other end of the phone hangs in the air as a slow smile creeps along one side of my face.
"I'm not waiting another day, Joel. I want to marry Ethan. I want to marry him... Today."
(story written by @Moffy_MPWL)
Ethan
Part Two
The dream was always the same. The spinning, with snow and foliage flying by at alarming speeds. Then there was the impact, with the screaming of voices and tyres drowning out the sound of my own heart pounding. Then, the vague memory of Izzy getting out of the car before everything went black. That was, inevitably, followed by the blood. It was everywhere. The petrol, the smell heady and making me light-headed, and lastly, Scott's pale face.
This was when I woke up.
Always.
I sometimes woke up feeling blessed that I didn't relive the whole thing with all the painful details. Instead, I got pictures and senses thrown at me, until I woke up in a cold sweat, my heart and head pounding in unison with my best friend’s name on my lips.
The pain of the crash was nothing in comparison to the pain of losing one of the constants in my life.
He might as well have been my brother, our brother.
Dean wasn't taking it well at all either.
Scott was... He was my Paris. He was my voice of reason, the person I went to when I just needed to be slapped back into reality. The only person, other than Dean, to believe I could beat my addiction and made sure to be there every step of the way to pick me up if I got anywhere near tripping... And now he was gone.
It was like losing Mum all over again. The darkness of the gaping void inside me a painful reminder that no matter how many times I woke up, it wasn't going to change the fact that he wasn't there anymore. Knowing that if I picked up the phone and dialed his number, he wouldn't be there to answer it.
If it hadn't been for Izzy, I'd be drowning in my grief. She'd been my strength, my heart and my soul through all of this. From the moment we'd climbed onto that plane to the moment we landed, she held my hand, the physical contact constant to remind me she was there. There were days I was a shell, my body going through the motions while I was trapped in my own head, beating against the walls of my own making. Yet she knew how to knock those walls down and pull me free from the wreckage, all the while making it look effortless. Her smile offering me light in the darkness.
Rolling onto my side, I saw the thin gauze curtains floating in the breeze, the sun beating off the cerulean blue water that rolled lazily over the sand. The briny tang of the salt water filled the room, clearing the last shadows of the dream from my head. Reaching my arm and patting the empty space she normally occupied, I let out a sigh. I hated waking up so late that she was gone.
Sitting up and swinging my legs over the edge of the bed, I rested my elbows on my knees and dropped my head, rubbing it and trying to find the motivation to get up. Even the warm breeze blowing through the open doors didn't help.
With a glance at the clock, I realized I'd once again slept almost twelve hours. For some reason my body seemed to crave it. Whether it was grief or the slow relaxation and catching up from weeks of sleeplessness, I didn't know. I wasn't even sure how I'd managed to get the tan I had. I wasn't a complete zombie, even though I felt like it sometimes. There were moments when we were with Paris and Joel that things would feel somewhat normal and I was able to stop the memories from antagonizing me constantly.
I clung to these days. I would throw myself into Joel's sudden need to teach me baseball, or the piggy back fights in the pool where laughter would surround us. Even the days just sat next to the pool where I busied myself admiring Izzy's bikini-clad body helped. It was those moments when I had nothing to fill my time that became the hardest, and sitting there alone with nothing to do was exactly the kind of thing I'd been trying to avoid.
Pushing up to my feet, I headed to the open door and looked out at the white sands, my hands gripping the frame over my head as my eyes searched for Izzy by the pool or down by the sea, but she was nowhere in sight, and neither were Joel or Paris. I don't know how long I stood like that, staring at the palm trees in my view, but it was enough time to let my mind wander. The sand transformed to frost, the warm breeze a bitterly cold wind driving the snow toward me unapologetically.
No matter how many time I looked at this scene and tried to rework it to where I saved him, I couldn't find it. Not unless I'd gained superpowers. Unfortunately, that didn't stop the guilt from drowning me as it flooded my system. I hid these moments from my girl as best I could. She saw right through me and knew exactly what I was thinking, then did everything in her power to distract me, even when she herself was hurting. Not that I was complaining. The sex was, as always, mind blowing and all consuming. She was the only person on the planet that I could totally immerse myself in and never grow tired. I couldn't get enough of her.
There were nights I woke up from a dead sleep, the nightmares lingering on the edges of my mind as my arms reached out for her. Our lips would meet, urgency taking control as we made love, learning and memorizing every moan and groan, every curve and soft spot on her body to hold with me forever. I would never take her for granted. She was everything to me.
As my eyes took in the paradise laid out before me, that night at the airport played out in my mind over and over again. From seeing Paris and then Joel, to finally realizing why the flight attendant kept giving us funny looks. Izzy and I had been a mess. Blood and dirt streaked over us, our clothes torn from the barbed wire fences we'd traipsed over. We'd both been soaked through by the snow by the time she'd had enough signal to call a taxi.
Thankfully, Paris had been more than happy to go shopping for us in duty free, her arms full of bags as she boarded the plane, ignoring the looks of the other first class passengers. When the fasten seat belts sign finally flickered off, I went to the bathroom to change and at least try and clean up. Considering how in shock Izzy and I had been, it was Paris' quick mind that came up with the excuse that we'd had a flat and got splashed on the side of the road. Not sure that explained the bruises, but it seemed to appease the questioning looks being aimed at us.
Nothing, however, prepared me for the look in the mirror as I squeezed into the small space. Hollow, gaunt, haunted and empty were just a few of the things that passed through my mind. Then came the guilt. Guilt at leaving Scott behind, guilt at dragging Izzy into all of this and letting her see me this broken. Guilt at leaving Dean to deal with all the shit. All of it had come crashing down and before I'd known it, I was huddled into the small space trying my best to not fall apart as the tears fell freely.
My best friend was gone.
My brother and his girl were on the run.
Paris and Joel were being dragged into this mess just before Christmas.
Izzy was... Well, she was heartbroken and just as lost as I was, and it was all because of me.
My selfishness. My need for answers and justice.
I was an arrogant son-of-a-bitch. Tracing my steps back, I realized that it all started because I went to that pub the second time. The first, it was just a passing question, but the second... That was me starting to look for answers, and it tipped them off to my intentions. How could I have been so reckless? How could I have thought, for even a second, that they wouldn't try and hit me where it hurt? Killing me would never have been enough for them. It would have silenced me, but it wouldn't have made the point they'd wanted to make. I wouldn't have been the example.
Dropping my hands from the frame and rubbing my head, I turned away from the idyllic scene and back to the disaster that had become our temporary home. This was why I hated being alone. The memories... They forced me to relive every moment over and over again.
The worst, perhaps, was the strain of his voice as he made us leave. He'd sacrificed himself to give us a chance to live, and that wasn't what I was doing right now. I needed to honor his memory and live for the two of us. I needed to man the fuck up and do something other than mope around this room.
As hard as it was, I needed to get past my grief and make him proud of me. He'd been there through every important moment in my life and death would not take that away from me. He would live through our memories and I'd be damned if I let that memory be the one of his death.
I needed to focus on the good memories. There were plenty of them after all.
Like the first Christmas after rehab at his parents’ house. Or the night I opened the club with him at my side. The strength he gave me on my twenty-first birthday when I got the letter from my mum... These were all true images of Scott. The man I knew, know and understood he could be.
Resolved, I made my way back into the room with open eyes, and finally spotted what I'd missed before. There was a note on the sideboard next to the television. It was sat on a pile of new clothes that I'd never seen before. The closer I got, the more I recognized the loopy handwriting on it, and for the first time that morning, I felt a smile creep up on me, my lips curling until I reached for the note, needing to see her words.
My lazy lover,
Once again that horrendous snoring you do woke me up and forced me out into the daylight, which completely goes against the vampire thing we've had going on. C'est la vie! I guess I'll just have to go out and do some more shopping with Goose... You do realize that she's relentless, right? She's a machine, but it's nice to spend time with her.
You, however, owe me some well deserved us time! I plan on cashing in on that this evening. This means you have a day to fill before our date! Whatever will you do without me?
I bought you some date clothes... Wear them or suffer the consequences, which I haven't decided on yet, but you should be scared! No, seriously, stop smiling and be terrified.
I love you with everything I am. Goose has her phone if you need us.
Your fiancee and love of your life,
Izzy
xoxoxo
The smile had grown as my eyes scanned every single word. No wonder she was a writer, she could rearrange letters to make it sound like a song, to lift or drop your emotions and most of all, she could inject intonation into them. I could almost see her cheeky smile as she'd written that note.
Though I had lost a huge part of my life, I still had a couple of important ones in my grasp. Scott had given me that, and I was determined not to waste the opportunity. I would never forget him for as long as I lived, and I would cherish everything I had because of him, and that started today!
Moffy
Part Three
The ocean has always fascinated me in ways I can't even begin to explain. Whenever I'm beside it, I'm calm. I'm focused. Everything is relaxed. All my senses are on vacation, lying on a sun lounger with a Piña Colada in hand.
Today is no different. The gentle lapping of the waves casts a trance over me, weaving its magic around my body in that special way it always has done. Each gentle hiss it makes as it recedes back into itself causes my breath to catch in my throat.
The nerves that should be present simply aren't. The difference between my state of mind this morning and my state of mind now is like the night compared to the day. The contrast is so huge; it’s hard for me to believe a whole year of soul searching and healing hasn’t passed by in between.
My bare feet pad against the soft, warm, white sand as I slowly stroll along the water’s edge in my dress, my hand hitching the material up on one side so it doesn't get wet. Not that it would matter if it did. I wouldn't care. All I care about is this moment... this feeling that has taken over my soul. I'm almost floating, looking down on the world and seeing it so clearly for the first time. This is what I want more than anything. The timing may not be perfect and we may not have everyone here we crave so desperately, but we’ve been handed a second shot at life, and I won’t disrespect Scott’s memory any longer by refusing to live it.
As I look out to the horizon and raise my chin to take in the tranquil scenery around me, I feel like my vision has been optimized whilst I slept the last week through. The grains of sand fill the gaps between my toes in comfort and quiet support. The sky is the palest of blues with not a cloud up there to interrupt it. The turquoise waters seem to shine much brighter than ever before. Every spot the sun hits twinkles as brightly as Julia's diamond ring.
Which is now mine. Which will stay mine, forever. Until I take my very last breath on this earth.
Lucas stands beside me, his book of prayer in one hand and a huge, beaming, white smile shining brightly against his Afro Caribbean skin.
"You seem calm, Isabella,” he says softly, his voice floating in the light, barely there breeze. He's just called me by that name… the one I have always despised, and yet I haven't even flinched.
My returning smile is almost lazy, my eyes slowly falling closed as I inhale the warm air into my still-aching lungs. "I feel calm, Lucas. I haven't felt this at peace in a long time, which is strange.”
Taking a step closer, he rests his palm against my shoulder. "That's when you know it's right."
Turning to face him, my eyes staring back into his, hoping he can see what I feel, I whisper, "I never thought I could love a man so intensely. I never thought I could love at all."
He shrugs so lightly it's barely noticeable. "We're all walking on an unknown path. I find it's best to think less and embrace what life gifts you. No matter how big or small that gift is."
My lips press tightly together, a weak smile trying to push against them. "I never used to do that. Not until... Not until we lost a good friend recently. One I will never forget. One who I never got a chance to appreciate fully. I won't ever let that happen again."
Lucas' fingers pat my back once as he tilts his head to the side. "I'm sorry for your loss. But through every tragedy, we receive a lesson. It sounds like your lesson has brought you and your fiancé here today."
"My fiancé." I smile slowly, a sigh of appreciation escaping my lips. "My Ethan." How did I get so lucky? What did I do to deserve him in my life? The other half of my soul rests next to his and his lays next to mine. Somewhere along the way, we become one. Somewhere between that disastrous first date and now, he became the oxygen I need to stay alive.
Lucas' deep chuckle wakes me from my Walker-induced reverie right before we both hear the sounds of Paris & Joel in the distance. Their footsteps only just audible against the pathway that leads them down to this private, idyllic beach, where I've been patiently waiting for what feels like forever.
My whole body seems to come alive with an indescribable energy as I think about who they have following behind them. The butterflies take flight in my stomach like never before, each one jostling with another in a frenzy of excitement and impatience.
Lucas moves aside, allowing me full view of the pathway at the top of the beach. Both my friends come into sight at the edge of the palm trees and exotic plants, and I can’t help but smile widely at the sight of them both. Their returning smiles seem to shine even brighter than my own. Their emotions are so clear, I can feel them from all the way over here, just forty paces away, but it seems like miles. I want to hug them, hold them, thank them for being there for me through all of life's ups and downs. I want to thank them for today, for making this possible when only yesterday it felt like everything was impossible, even living. I want to release all these tears that hide behind my eyes and cry out to be seen. Not the sad ones... the happy ones. The ones these two friends have helped to provide.
The second their bare feet hit the warm sand, they stop moving forward. They know what I want for this wedding. They know how much I love them, but all I want to see and hear is him. They respect my decision without question or protest. And I couldn't be more proud to watch them now as they help me to pull this off.
Joel grabs Paris' waist and pulls her to his side as she struggles to fight back her own tears as she locks eyes with me and blows me a gentle kiss. I’m just about to blow one back, when their heads both turn to look behind them in perfect synchronicity as they wait for Ethan to make his way through the clearance.
My eyes follow theirs and all I can do is stare at the space I know he's going to fill... And when I eventually see him, his head bobbing down as he ducks a low branch and his feet meet the beach for the first time, I'm left completely breathless.
Ethan lifts his head slowly, looking around in slight confusion until his beautiful brown eyes meet with mine across the sand, his lips parting slowly as he looks me up and down, casting a quick unsure glance in the direction of Lucas.
I’m filled with frustrated longing, yet again. I so badly want to move closer, I want to run to him and hold him tight and scream to the world how much I love him. But all I can do is gaze through the heavy well of tears that have gathered in the pockets of my eyes and smile shyly.
I try to recollect a time where he looked more amazing than he does right now, but in my hazy, euphoric mind, there's nothing. Even with a few fading cuts upon his face, he's never looked more perfect than he does in this moment. The slight edge of vulnerability on his face makes him look softer than he has for what feels like such a long time. His beige shorts and white shirt hang perfectly from his toned, bronzed body. To me, he looks like home - where I need to be for the rest of my life. I don’t think I have ever felt entirely worthy of him, and now is no exception.
I watch as he begins to slowly move towards me before he hesitates and stops in his tracks. His head turns back to Paris & Joel as if to ask them if what he thinks is happening, is really happening. They both give him a warm smile and slight nod of the head before he turns back to me in disbelief, his gaze catching sight of the traitor tear that spills down my cheek.
Unable to stop myself, I hitch my dress up just enough so I can move freely and my feet begin to walk at a much slower pace than they really want to. As I make my way over to him, my toes digging in the sand, the loose strands of hair blowing around my face, I force myself to stop a few feet away from him, just in case there's any chance this isn't what he wants.
My voice is a choked whisper when I eventually speak, the overwhelming need to touch him, taking over me. "Ethan?"
The sound of his name on my lips seems to trigger his own emotion, his eyes glazing over with moisture. "Izzy?"
Lifting my arm up in the air, I hold my hand out for him to take, my gaze locking in on his with nothing but love pouring out.
This is it. This is the moment I've been waiting for my whole life. That empty space has finally been filled. My heart, this man now holds in his hands.
"Ethan," I breathe. "I... I can't even begin to explain what you mean to me. I don't just love you, I adore and worship you. You're all I ever think about. How much I want you, how much I need you, how much I simply can't live a moment of my life without you. You've become my whole world and more."
His lips part slightly as he stares at my hand before looking back into the very depths of my eyes, his speechlessness forcing me to take another steadying breath and step closer.
"We had someone that believed in our love so much, he gave up his life for it. I don't know about you, but I don't want to waste another second of that gift we’ve been given. I've loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you, I was just too scared to admit it back then. I'm not scared anymore. Not one little bit." I tilt my head to one side and smile back at him with nothing but happiness and certainty. "The only thing I'm scared of is going another day without being able to call you my husband. So here I am, wearing my vulnerable little heart on my sleeve, hoping that you'll walk back to the water’s edge with me, hold me in your arms, look me in the eyes, vow to stay with me forever and make me your wife. You, me and a lifetime of being together. What do you say?"
Then I hold my breath... And I wait.
(story written by @Ethan_MPWL)
"Ethan... You may now kiss your bride."
(story by @Moffy_MPWL)
(story written by @Moffy_MPWL)
Part Eight
(story written by @Ethan_MPWL)
Ethan
Part Four
I'd made some form of resolution that morning. Deciding to celebrate Scott's life and memory, rather than grieve for him, had actually helped. For the first time since he'd died, I didn't have to force my thoughts somewhere else. As it turned out, not thinking about him at all had been one of the main problems.
He'd been in my life for as I could remember and I couldn't reroute my thoughts to avoid him. It was a fool’s errand and I should have seen that from the beginning.
After lounging by the pool for a few hours, I took a nap and waited for my girl to come back. I finally received a message from the front desk that she would be there at about six to collect me. The terminology had made me laugh. It made it sound like she was on a school run rather than meeting her fiancé to sweep him off his feet and into the night life of the exclusive, all inclusive, hotel that Joel had put us up in.
So, I'd made sure to be dressed and ready for her by six, even though I'm not entirely certain why. Izzy was a one of a kind, and was never anywhere on time. It wasn't her fault. She always made a concerted effort to plan everything perfectly, but it never failed. Something always inevitably came up. It was almost expected of her at this point, I think.
"Walker? You in there?"
"Paris?"
Heading to the door and pulling it open, I actually took a step back. Paris was in a gorgeous dress, her hand clutching Joel's with a death grip that had turned her knuckles white, her eyes lit with excitement.
"Everything okay?"
She stepped forward, releasing Joel's hand to straighten the collar of my shirt. her head tipping to the side as she examined her work. "Mav's late, but everything is fine. She asked us to come and get you. You're almost passable, Walker."
"Thanks?"
I looked at the mirror by the door and shrugged. I'd actually managed to get a tan, and damn if the colors Izzy had picked out hadn't made that all the more prevalent. I could have done with a shave, but it was nothing devastating and my girl liked a little stubble burn occasionally.
"Come on, Ethan. She'll panic if we take any longer."
"Lead the way." I chuckled, putting the key card in my pocket and giving a quick glance over my shoulder at the room to check everything was in its place.
Now, I'm not one for noticing little things normally, and whether it was down to what we'd experienced in the last couple of months or that they were just that obvious, Paris and Joel were acting strange, even for them. There was an air about them. It buzzed and crackled as they hurried through the lobby of the hotel and out toward the small private beach the hotel had warned us away from.
"What the hell are you three up to?" I asked after almost getting hit in the face by a huge, thick glass door. Stood there, waiting for a response, at the whisper of the door resealing itself, I took in my surroundings.
The huge palm trees were blocking the slowly setting sun and the beach beyond it. There were tropical plants everywhere. I recognized it from walking past it almost every day. I'd wondered plenty of time what was going on behind this wall. It seemed I was about to find out... But why?
Whether they'd heard my question or not, neither Paris nor Joel slowed. They were walking quickly enough that they were almost the path's end as I stood startled behind them.
"Nothing," they said at the same time, before looking at one another and grinning, their hands linked between their bodies. Joel's thumb had been rubbing a calming circle over the back of her hand. Paris looked over her shoulder and flashed me a bright smile before disappearing around the corner, towing Joel behind her.
"Nothing. Yeah, right," I mumbled, starting after them and shaking my head. They'd been amazing the whole time we'd been on the island. They'd kept things upbeat and positive, never allowing us to retreat into ourselves, but this was different. This was genuine excitement and happiness, and didn't that just get my curiosity flowing.
I followed them at my own pace, ducking under a low-hanging branch as the path ended and the sand began. It was still warm from the day's heat as my feet sank into it. I was almost blinded by the sun that was now on its free fall to the horizon, the orange glow dancing over everything it touched. I blinked once, twice, three times until my eyes cleared and I saw the one thing that would ever eclipse a sunset like the one happening behind her.
Izzy looked beautiful. She wore a long dress that hugged her curves. It fell to the ground in a graceful twist of material and tickled her bare toes. Her hair had been left free to dance around her in the gentle breeze, the strands catching the hues of the sun making it look like a halo around her. Even from that distance I could see the love in her eyes. She was resplendent, radiant and she was mine.
I was so caught up in just looking at her that it took me a moment to see the gentleman grinning beside her. For a breathless second, I was confused, and questions filled my head faster than I could catch them. It took a minute to figure it out, but taking in the scene - his deep tanned skin and the thick book in his hands - my heart pounded in my chest. Was it possible?
There was a gravitational pull between our bodies after that, my feet having made the move on their own as the hope and elation ran through my veins. My heart pounded in my chest in a completely different way than it had in weeks, and my future - the one I'd somehow misplaced in the mess of losing Scott - reappeared and spread itself out before me. I was staring at my future. She was the most ethereal and beautiful thing I'd ever seen in my whole life.
"Is this... Is she... Are we...?"
Paris' quiet giggle and Joel's warm smile accompanied their answer, which spurred me forward with more enthusiasm than I'd felt in my whole life. She wanted to marry me. She'd set all of this up on her own and she looked happy. I wasn't sure which was more of a surprise to me, but it didn’t matter. We were there, together.
Her single crystal caught the sun and made time stand still in the small gap between us. I wanted so much to brush it away. It was my instinct to protect her, but at the same time, I was torn. It was a tear borne from happiness, something I hadn't been completely sure we'd find again.
We started toward one another, the warm sand cradling my feet as I tried to stay vertical. It was all too surreal. I'd thought about our wedding so much since I knew what I wanted with her, but this surpassed every fantasy and daydream I'd ever had.
"Ethan?" Her voice was shaky with emotion, the sound barely there as she said my name.
"Izzy?" I managed to choke out as the tears gathered without permission, blocking my vision of her.
I'm not sure how long we just stood there looking at one another. It could have been an eternity for all I knew in that moment. As cheesy as it sounded, my chest swelled with the love I had for her. Every moment we'd been through had led to that one beautiful second between us.
She held out her hand to me, her smile so broad that mine grew to match it. Our eyes met and held and I could feel the connection running between us as she took a breath to steady her nerves.
"Ethan," she breathed. "I... I can't even begin to explain what you mean to me. I don't just love you, I adore and worship you. You're all I ever think about. How much I want you, how much I need you, how much I simply can't live a moment of my life without you. You've become my whole world and more."
I couldn't find the words to say back to her. Not because I didn't feel the same way, but because I could never have worded it more perfectly than she had. She was everything to me. I didn't want to even imagine my life without her in it.
"We had someone that believed in our love so much, he gave up his life for it. I don't know about you, but I don't want to waste another second of that gift we’ve been given. I've loved you since the moment I laid eyes on you, I was just too scared to admit it back then. I'm not scared anymore. Not one little bit." She tilted her head to one side and smiled back at me with nothing but happiness and certainty. "The only thing I'm scared of is going another day without being able to call you my husband. So here I am... Wearing my vulnerable little heart on my sleeve, hoping that you'll walk back to the water’s edge with me, hold me in your arms, look me in the eyes, vow to stay with me forever and make me your wife. You, me and a lifetime of being together. What do you say?"
She sucked in a breath and held my gaze with hers. Now it was up to me. I had to find a way to put how I felt into words so she'd understand. I had to let her know that there was nothing on the face of the planet that would make me happier. Happy, however, wasn't a big enough word. I wanted it to be grander.
As my brain searched for words, my body reacted. With our entwined fingers, I pulled her closer and lowered myself to my knees. The tears fell freely as I buried my face in her stomach. The moment between us was more perfect than I ever could have imagined and her words wrapped around my emotions as the words finally formed.
"Izzy Moffit, there is nothing in this world I want more than for you to be my wife. More than that, I can't imagine being anywhere but at your side for the rest of my life." I pulled back, and looked up at her, my eyes holding hers as our tears fell freely. "You've just made me the happiest man alive and I plan on spending the rest of my life making you feel the same way. I'll make mistakes, I'll fuck up, but I will always be right there beside you, righting the wrongs and protecting you in every way I can. So yes, baby, I will walk with you to the water and hold you in my arms and promise before our friends and whoever else is watching that I will love, cherish and honour you for the rest of our lives."
I stood slowly, my arms folding around her waist and picking her up, spinning us both before I set her on her feet and took her hand. Hell, I was ready to run to the guy stood by the water, towing Izzy behind me so we could finally make it official. His smile met mine as I walked us slowly toward him, though, his hand offered as we stopped in front of him.
"Ethan, it is nice to finally meet you. I am Lucas, and this," he said grandly, sweeping his hand between us, "Is a good match. I can see the love that is between the two of you."
Izzy's gentle squeeze of my hand pulled my attention back to her, our matching smiles aimed at one another before we directed them, once again, to Lucas.
"Love,” he started, gesturing for us to raise our hands. He covered it with one of his, the twinkle in his eyes telling us this was something he enjoyed doing. "Is a rare and beautiful thing, but soul mates, that is even more unique. I have seen a lot of people claiming love between them, but the two of you need not claim it as it is indisputable. You radiate it."
I didn't miss the gentle sigh from Izzy, even as the rolling waves claimed it and rushed over our bare feet. Lucas chuckled, the spark in his eye and his broad smile contagious. Stood there, with him talking in his rich accent, I was hit with the overwhelming feeling of right.
I think part of me had expected to be nervous, to have a niggling self-doubt or questions, but there was nothing but the feeling that this was meant to be, and the happiness radiating from me in waves. This was Izzy and I... I had no questions or fears, just the instinct that this was natural, inevitable, that this was always going to be where we ended up.
I was hers, and she was mine.
Moffy
Part five
I’ve seen Ethan look happy before. I’ve actually seen him in almost every situation imaginable. I know all his smiles and all his expressions. I have a few favourites, ones I try and pull from memory whenever I am feeling blue.
The first being his dopey, half-awake smile. The one he wears when he first sees me laying beside him each morning; the slow register of my face in his squinting, sleepy eyes, the shy crease of one side of his mouth that almost meets the small dimple in his left cheek. I love that face.
The second being the smile he wears when he walks in from a long day or night at work; the one that shows how happy he is to finally be near me again, making me feel like no man has ever missed his woman the way he has missed me, even when it's only been a few short hours. Any time spent apart is time we both despise.
The third one is the smile he gives me right before we’re about to make love. That moment when our eyes connect and the bond between us literally tugs at both our hearts, neither one of us able to believe that we have found each other, that we have what we have and that, by some miracle, we get to do this for the rest of our whole, entire lives. I don’t need to explain that smile any further. I couldn't even if I tried.
Those are the times when I have to pinch myself and check that all this is real. Those are my favourite moments in life.
Or at least, they were.
Now they simply pale into insignificance.
I’ve never felt so full of emotion as I stand in front of the man I love and commit myself to him for life. This smile he’s wearing is something I have never seen before and something that I can't imagine will ever be matched, ever again. Any doubts I had about this being right, given the timings and what happened with Scott, well, they turned to dust the moment Ethan fell to his knees on the sand and clung to my waist.
The fading sun on the horizon is casting the warmest of glows upon both our faces. It seems all at once, the sky filled itself with oranges and reds. Any breeze that floated around us before has now vanished. The birds are no longer flying, the waves have stopped hissing their tunes, the trees stand as still as they have ever done before. The whole world is on pause to watch us marry.
If I didn't know better, I would almost believe that the big man himself has instructed all of his creations to just be still until this is a done deal. Although something tells me both Scott and Julia are really the ones responsible for making this happen... And if that's the case, I'm grateful. We have had so many things try get in the way of our happiness over the last eight months, all we both need now is the silence. My heart swells with an aching love for the two of them and I wish more than anything that they could be here beside us. They both gave us the gift of life. We owe them everything. Everything.
As I look up at Ethan, both our hands held tight together in front of us, I inhale a deep breath of air and get ready to speak when Lucas instructs me to. In our brief meet earlier today, I made sure he knew exactly what I wanted from this ceremony. I just wanted to speak openly. to be able to tell him what he means to me, no matter how foolish it may seem to everyone else. This isn’t about religion, or script. I’m not bothered who approves, who witnesses and who thinks this is wrong. All I care about is Ethan Aaron Walker.
Lucas’ palm gently meets my shoulder to tell me it’s time. His physical touch pulls me from drowning in the very depths of Ethan’s eyes. Grinning harder than I ever have before, I start to speak slowly and clearly, pulling his body that little bit closer to mine.
“Ethan, I’ve never in my whole life needed anything or anyone the way I need you. You’re more vital to me than air. Even the thought of not spending the rest of my life with you causes my heart to break. Whenever I’ve been down or struggled through the day, you’ve been the one to pick me up, throw me over your shoulder and do the hard work for the both of us. You make me forget my past. You make me forget all the things I hate about myself. You make me feel real, like everything else I did before you came into my life was meaningless, because you, the other half of my soul, weren’t there by my side. Every mistake I’ve ever made, you wipe from the slate for me. You refuse to let me be negative.” I swallow gently, the unrehearsed words suddenly rushing out faster than I ever intended them to as my smile and enthusiasm grows wilder. “You make me a better person just by being you. You don’t even know you’re doing it, but I promise you, every day since I have met you, I’ve grown that little bit stronger and a hell of a lot happier. I’m a wannabe wordsmith, Ethan. It's been my passion for as long as I can remember... But, God help me, I can’t seem to find the right words to tell you how much I love you. Love just isn’t enough. No word is enough. If I could create a whole new language just to tell you how strongly I feel, then I would. I would do it for you, because there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do. But the words no longer seem to matter as much because you're my new passion now."
The long overdue tears of happiness begin to fall down my cheeks and for once, I’m not ashamed to show them off as proudly as I can. My lips part even wider as a small laugh escapes me and my left hand goes to cup his right cheek.
“I just love you, Ethan. I love you so much it hurts. You're in my blood. I want to wake up next to you for the rest of my life. That’s all there is. That’s all there ever will be. Anything else I say is just wasted poetry.”
His eyes fill with moisture. The barely there sun mixed with the twinkling of the ocean makes his unshed tears sparkle as brightly as my engagement ring. He looks completely ineffable... And I am in total awe.
He lifts his hand to cup my face, mirroring my hold on him, and gently bends at the knee so our faces are level. His eyes search mine with nothing but complete adoration before he swallows lightly and begins to speak.
"Izzy, I've never met anyone like you in my life. I knew from the moment I saw you that you would be the only woman I would ever want or love. I can't imagine my life without you in it. I don't want to. You know the kind of person I was before you. You knew I had demons, but you took a chance on me anyway. There are days I wonder how I got so lucky, when I wonder why you picked me when you could have had anyone, but I'm not stupid enough to ever let go of you."
He closes his eyes slowly and I know immediately where his thoughts have gone and who they have turned to. The memories of Ethan's troubled past will never leave him, but I will always be here to help pull him through. Pressing my cheek further into his palm, I tenderly rub the apple of his with my thumb and simply wait for him to open his eyes. When he does, I'm there, smiling back at him with everything I have, waiting for him to be ready to go on. I'm in no rush. I never want this to end.
A single tear falls down his cheek and I softly brush it away, my gaze falling back on to his mouth as he licks his lips before practically whispering his next words to me.
"Every day with you is a new adventure and you never stop surprising me. You know me better than I know myself. When I'm down, you make me smile. When I'm angry, you're the only person that knows how to get in my head and make me see reason. No matter what life throws at us, I know that having you by my side means we won't be defeated. You have my heart, you own my soul, and I know you're the only person that I can trust with them. I love you with everything I am and with every part of me, but even that doesn't seem like a big enough word. To me, you are everything, and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you as my wife, and share everything that the future holds with you. It's always been you, Izzy, and I will spend the rest of my life showing you just what that means."
Then there's silence.
And the silence lingers as we both enjoy this moment in our lives. It seems neither one of us knows just what to do or how to go on. I've read books before, I've seen all the movies and all the happily ever afters that the world has to offer. But never, in my whole life, could I have imagined how good it would feel to get my own, or how much mine would completely eclipse the rest. I want to pinch every part of him to see if this moment is real. He loves me and I love him. He's everything I could ever want and more.
He's my life.
The world suddenly seems to start turning around us again. I hear the gentle sound of a small wave meeting the shore, then a bird flying overhead, circling above us as though in celebration. A gentle breeze blows between us, causing the loose strands of my hair to blow against both our faces. Paris' choked cries of happiness linger in the background... And all the while, we just keep ahold of one another and smile until our cheeks ache.
My shoulders eventually start to shake ever so lightly and my hand starts to tremble against his face. Before I know it, Ethan's body is reacting in exactly the same way. Then the tears fall hard but all either one of us can do is laugh through our blessed happiness and cling on tight, our eyes never breaking contact for a second as our foreheads fall to rest together.
Lucas speaks beside us, his own smile evident in his soothing Caribbean voice as he asks us to repeat certain vows, speak at certain times and to say the all important 'I do's'. The words roll off both our tongues without much effort or thought. Because I do. I really do. I pledge to give my whole life to this man in front of me and I don't question his own emotions one bit. I feel it. The connection we have is almost palpable.
"I hate to have to do this to you both, but I need you to break contact for just one moment." His deep chuckle escapes from beside us, causing both Ethan and I to only smile harder as we reluctantly turn to face him, dropping our hands from the other’s cheek before grabbing hold of each other's waists ever so tightly. Lucas eyes our embrace and smiles brightly. "It's time for the exchanging of the rings".
Now it's my turn to laugh discreetly as I slowly shake my head and lower my chin to my chest in a moment of disbelief. Cringing internally, I look back up at Ethan through fluttering eyelashes and flash him a small mischievous grin.
"What is it?" he whispers through a smirk as he looks down on me.
Lucas digs into the pocket of his linen trousers whilst taking a step closer towards us. Holding his arm up in between the both of us, he slowly uncurls his palm and eyes Ethan's reaction to the two rings that sit there.
I glance nervously down at the rings and back up to Ethan. His eyes widen with nothing but humour before he looks back down at me, then across at Lucas.
"Excuse me a moment, will you?" he says to him as he tries to control his smile.
I've seen this look so many times before, and usually it leads to magical things happening in the bedroom, but as he turns to face me, for the first time in such a long time, I'm confused by what he's about to do.
Gripping my waist with one hand and cupping my neck with another, his eyes trail across my lips before falling down to my shoulders. Gently brushing his thumb along the tender spot of my neck, he leans forward to get as close to my skin as he can without losing control. His mouth barely touches my earlobe, but when it does, I'm filled with nothing but goosebumps and love. Ethan's low seductive voice rings through my ears.
"This is just another reason amongst the billions of reasons that already exist as to why I am so utterly, completely and entirely in love with and devoted to you, Izzy."
"You like them?" I breathe out through a smile, completely lost in him and nothing else.
"They're perfect," he whispers. "Just like you."
My eyes close for the briefest of moments to enjoy his touch before I turn my head to his, press my lips to his skin and smile against his cheek. "Do you want the pink or the blue?"
His laughter breaks free as he reluctantly pulls away and turns back to face Lucas, both of them fighting for the biggest smile of the year award.
"I think blue’s more my colour, don't you, Lucas?" he asks him before lifting his hand and reaching for the pink version of the plastic 'I love the Bahamas' rings that I picked up in the gift shop earlier today. All I can do is watch him as he lifts my left hand with his right and waits to be instructed on what to say next. Time stands still whilst our officiate speaks.
As he slides the ring onto my finger, and I slide his onto his, both of us repeating the words we need to say to one another, it's like I can almost feel and hear the lock on the door of our marriage click open. We're almost there. I feel like I'm floating. The emotions that run through me are all consuming. We both repeat more vows and make more promises to each other that I just know we will never break. I want to speak openly or make some grand gesture to show him how right this all feels, but the truth is, I'm lost. I'm lost in a bubble of Ethan. And I think he's lost in me, too.
And before I even realise what's happening, the wind picks up just that little bit more, blowing my hair back over my shoulders and towards Ethan. My casual floaty dress sweeps to one side and my feet seem to sink that little bit further into the warm sand. My chin is raised as I look up at him and my hands squeeze both of his tighter than ever before. Then I hear the words I've been secretly waiting to hear since the day I met him.
"Isabella and Ethan, it's an honour and my absolute pleasure to be able to officially declare to you both, that you are now husband and wife." The air catches in my throat as I gasp through the reality of this moment. Ethan's smile mirrors my own as he stares down at me, the look in his eyes suddenly shifting from one of contentment and a sense of right, to something I have never seen him wear before. His feet shift in front of me as he closes the gap between us before pausing in his step... He's waiting for it. I'm waiting for it. We're all waiting for the final words to be spoken. I feel Lucas take a step back away from us before he finally clears his throat, leans forward and quietly says...
"Ethan... You may now kiss your bride."
Ethan
Part Six
"Ethan... You may now kiss your bride."
The whole ceremony seemed to have been leading up to that point. Her vows, which brought more emotion than I knew how to process, the "I Do's", exchanging of the rings, smiles, tears and laughter... All of it led to this one moment, the seal on our marriage, and I couldn't have been happier.
With my hands on her hips, I pulled her as close to me as I could without crawling into her skin, and pressed my lips against hers with every ounce of love and happiness I was feeling. That we were feeling. My mind and body were solely focused on her every second as we indulged in one another for the first time as husband and wife.
Wife.
I'd had no doubts when I'd found out what she'd been up to. Seeing her stood there in that dress, the breeze embracing her as it rolled off the sea, I knew that it was right, that I would love this woman for the rest of my life. Marrying her was the most natural thing in the world. It was the only thing that could have elated me that much in that moment. Forever didn't seem like long enough to share with Izzy. Yet now, she was my wife, and I was her husband, and nothing would ever change that.
"Mrs. Walker," I breathed as we slowly pulled apart, our smiles matching as we pressed our foreheads together and just took in the moment together. "It has a ring to it."
Her soft giggle and the brush of her breath on my cheek was all I needed in that moment, reaffirmation that she was there and that this was real was more than I could have asked for.
After all we'd been through, seeing her happiness, and feeling my own radiate through me, was indescribable. This was the only way I could have seen our wedding going; her and I, in front of the world, quietly promising ourselves to one another. It had been about us, our love, and our need for one another. If anything, Scott's death had taught us that life was too short to put things off. We were fragile and things could change in a blink of an eye. We had to embrace what we had and stop wasting time. And my God had she done that beautifully. I couldn't imagine marrying her any other way.
Whether she'd known it or not, she'd given me the perfect day. My time on my own that morning had finally given me a chance to come to terms with what had happened and now, this was the perfect follow up. I'd promised to live, I'd promised Scott I would marry her, and I knew had he been there, he would have been just as happy as we were. Those weeks he'd stayed with us had cemented the friendship between the two of them, and though I regretted dragging him into in to the situation, I was glad they got to know one another better.
Lucas began speaking quietly in his soft Caribbean lilt, pulling me from my thoughts and back into the moment. His accent was musical and even I could hear the smile in it as he finalized everything for us, giving gentle instructions to seal the legality of it all. We had to sign the paperwork. Dot the I's and cross the T's and we were free to do what we wanted. I just had to convince myself to let go of her first.
I'd never been happier about signing a piece of paper in my life. The first had been signing for my club, but that had been moved to a distant second in comparison to the wedding certificate. This was the rest of my life, and it belonged to the woman I loved.
The moment our signatures were down on paper, we were bombarded by the only two of our friends there to witness the marriage. I think Paris actually squealed as she signed her name. She wore a grin matching ours as she threw her arms around Izzy and then me. All the while, our hands stayed linked between us.
"You did it!" She laughed, teetering back from us and burying herself into Joel's arms. Her smile was filled with a mixture of happiness and pride. It seemed like a lifetime ago that she'd made me promise not to give up on Izzy, but I saw the look she gave me, the one that said everything she hadn't said out loud. This was the ending she'd wanted for us. This was what she'd wanted to happen when she'd made me promise to treat her best friend with all of the love she knew I had for my girl.
I'd wanted it too. I thought back to the moment I'd seen her come out of the Casa door on our first date and knowing she was different. I'd never put effort into a woman before, but she'd been worth every insecurity and learning experience I'd gone through to finally get her. She was still worth every effort I put in. She always would be. She'd stood by me when most women would have run the other way. Every fight we'd had only seemed to bring us closer together, all of it leading up to this moment.
To forever.
Slipping in behind Izzy, I caught her left hand with my own, and lifted them in front of us, the pink and blue of the rings complementing one another on our newly tanned skin. These weren't exactly what I'd imagined putting on her finger, but it was oddly us. It suited us and our relationship, and though I imagined we'd replace them eventually, I knew they would always have a significance for the two of us.
"We did it." I grinned, echoing Paris' statement as Izzy leaned back against my chest, my thumb brushing over her plastic ring as the light began to fade around us. The warm orange glow illuminating everything.
"Yes we did," she said quietly, the happiness infused into every word as she rubbed her cheek against my chest and turned her head to kiss my jaw. "I'm a Mrs."
"Yes, you are." There was nothing but the crash of the waves as we looked at one another. The speechlessness came from losing myself in those beautiful blue eyes that seemed to reflect that of the ocean that roared around us. I was ready just to take her back to the room and consummate away until someone forced us to come up for air.
"We'd better go," Paris said, picking up Joel's arm to look at his watch, her grin more than telling me she'd read my intentions for her best friend, loud and clear. "I arranged a little something."
"When?" Izzy snorted, lifting her head to look at Paris. "You've been with me all day."
"A lady never reveals her secrets." She smirked, looking over to the gentleman that I'd forgotten in my lust for my wife. "Lucas, would you like to join us for a quick drink?"
"I would like nothing more, Paris," he said with a grin. "But regrettably I have a ceremony this evening."
With that, we said our goodbyes, my hands still tangled with Izzy's as I gave him a one armed hug of thanks. I didn't know him from Adam, but he would always be a huge part of this memory. He'd impacted our lives, he'd given me the greatest gift and made Izzy my wife; it only seemed natural to thank him like he was a member of our little family.
"You look after that wife of yours. She loves you."
"I will, Lucas. Believe me, I plan on doing exactly that."
"I have no doubts, my friend." He gave me another smile and moved to Izzy, hugging her tightly and whispering in her ear before heading down the beach with a wide smile on his lips.
"Where the hell did you find him?"
"Long story." Izzy grinned, turning in my arms and pressing a kiss to my neck as she pushed up on her toes. "Remind me to tell you... Later."
"Later? We're going to be busy later."
"How busy?"
"A night and morning worth of busy." Leaning into her ear and nipping her earlobe, I whispered the rest. "In every imaginable way possible."
Her shiver of anticipation and sigh of arousal made me glad my shorts were on the baggy side. Paris and Joel were there and really didn't need to see exactly what Izzy did to me. Although, it seemed it was a little too late for all of that.
"Not yet, you horny bastard." Paris laughed, heading up the beach to the hotel, her hand in Joel's. "I got a surprise for you first, remember?"
"I don't like surprises."
"Shut up, Mav. You'll love this one."
"You always say that."
"Am I ever wrong?"
"Consistently." Izzy snorted, stepping out of my arms and gripping my hand in hers.
We followed them up to the hotel slowly, our toes sinking in the sand and the briny ocean breeze dancing around us. Before we disappeared onto the path, I paused to look down at the beach where the tiki torches continued to burn around the small arbor where I'd seen Lucas stood with Izzy. It looked different in the dark, but it was etched into my mind the way it had been when I'd seen Izzy and realized what was going on. I would always see her like that when I thought of our wedding day, her hair and long dress dancing in the breeze as the happiness radiated from her.
The squeeze of her hand in mine, had our eyes meeting in the faint light of the hotel, and I knew she was thinking about it, too. She had the ability to make the whole world disappear when I was with her, and that day was no exception. Taking our vows, it had been just her and I. Her soft cheeks cradled in my hands as the love crackled between us. It was the way it should have been. A huge ceremony wasn't who we were and I realized that more than ever having lived the reality of our wedding. There was nothing more perfect than those moments.
Stepping in through the doors of the hotel, it was hard to miss the grins of the staff as we passed. Each one of them congratulated us in their lyrical accents as we passed, a small applause going up as we headed toward the doors to the more public beach. Whatever Paris had planned, I had a feeling most of these people were in on it. They lined the path to the door, grinning as Paris and Joel stepped to the side, and two porters pulled open the doors.
The beach was covered in candles, a low hanging tree was lit up with fairy lights falling like icicles, illuminating a table for two in the sand. The sound of the waves crashing over the shore complimenting Paramore's The Only Exception that crooned out quietly from hidden speakers. I felt Izzy's hand tighten in mine, a small shiver of excitement running through us both simultaneously.
"Paris!" Izzy whispered, her hand moving to her mouth as her eyes widened.
"See. Told ya! We've also upgraded you to the honeymoon suite. No arguments. The four of us will celebrate tomorrow, but tonight... You two just enjoy being together. I remember what it was like."
For the first time since I'd seen her on the beach, Izzy released my hand and threw both of her arms around her best friend. I looked at Joel and shook my head. It was too much, but I pulled him in for a hug anyway, chuckling as he made a comment about me not being his type.
I released him and grabbed Paris in a tight hug, almost speechless at her kindness and generosity.
"Thank you."
"No. Thank you, she's so happy, Ethan, and that's all I ever wanted for her."
"Me too, Pip. I can't thank you enough for all of this."
"Just enjoy it!"
"Oh I plan to."
"Didn't need to know that." She laughed, slapping my shoulder and stepping back toward Joel. "Now go and enjoy, you two."
"We will."
"You'd bett–" Paris was cut off, her words falling into a giggle as Joel draped her over his shoulder with a small wave, ignoring Paris' complaints as the doors were closed behind them, leaving Izzy and I alone in the most perfect setting imaginable.
"You'd bett–" Paris was cut off, her words falling into a giggle as Joel draped her over his shoulder with a small wave, ignoring Paris' complaints as the doors were closed behind them, leaving Izzy and I alone in the most perfect setting imaginable.
Moffy
Part Seven
Being left feeling speechless isn't something I have ever been comfortable with. Over the years, I've conditioned and prepared myself to have an answer for almost everything.
But tonight, I have nothing... And I'm thrilled about it. Anything I say in this moment will just ruin it completely.
Watching and laughing softly as Paris and Joel make their escape, I can't help but turn back to Ethan, grab both his hands and just stare at him. He shouldn't look this good... Not after the week we have both had. All we have done is cry, refuse to eat and sleep out in the sun. We've neglected ourselves individually, but not each other. The only way we've both been able to turn our minds blank is by making love endlessly. Surrounding myself in Ethan is the only thing that has allowed me to forget for even a split second.
But here he stands, looking, not just good, but divine. I'm not naive enough to think that what we've just shared isn't responsible for that.
We're married!
After years of denying that this moment would ever happen, it feels like it's almost refusing to register in my head. The lyrics of our song, the most important song in the world to me, gently rings out around us. The setting couldn't be more perfect if we had spent a thousand years planning it.
I'm in heaven.
Ethan's gorgeous brown eyes stare down at me with that look of his that means his thoughts mirror mine. We've both spent so many years being messed up, refusing to believe happiness is around the corner... And yet here we are, beyond happy. We're finally living in a dream after enduring so many nightmares.
"I love you."
"I love you more.” He grins as the back of his palm gently moves the hair away from my face.
"Not possible, hubby."
His smile changes from a gentle, adoring one to a super beam.
"It's more than possible, wife."
"You have no idea how good that sounds."
Creasing his eyes ever so slightly, he closes the gap between our mouths, going only half way as he sighs softly, his eyes searching mine as though he's looking into them, hoping to find a way to explain how he feels.
"I do know. I know everything you're feeling because I'm feeling it too. Only a thousand times heavier.
"I've never felt so..."
"Complete," I finish for him.
"Exactly," he whispers.
Rising up on my toes, I lean forward to kiss him softly. Every fibre of my being is telling me to forego anything else we have planned and to pounce on him right here, right now, but I'm also caught up in the setting and the moment. We have all the time in the world to connect our bodies together. This night on the beach is a one time thing only. I intend to enjoy it for all it's worth.
Reluctantly breaking away, I turn and start to make my way down to the table in the middle of the private sandy bay. Paris has completely outdone herself on this occasion. I've always known she was the best last minute party planner around, but this... This is a whole new level of perfection.
The breeze has almost faded. The waves are barely there as they meet the shore before receding back into themselves. The music around us is playing so gently and so perfectly, it's a struggle for me to hold the tears back as I turn in circles and admire her work, never letting go of Ethan's hand as I do.
"This doesn't feel real," he says quietly as he does the same, his eyes scanning all the hundreds of candles that lay on the ground whilst mine look up at the lights in the trees that hang above our heads.
"I was just going to say that." I smile, still looking up. I'm so caught up in the wonder of it all that I almost miss the sound of Ethan's low growl as he bends his knees, hurries closer towards me and scoops my body up in to a tight curl against his chest before spinning us around.
My emotions are a mess. I'm completely torn between wanting to cry, scream, laugh and just hold him. I've never felt such elation before. So I do it all. I giggle far too loud as he spins us around, the tears falling against his chest as the laughter and the happiness overtakes me. My hands cling to his neck as he guides me over to my chair.
"You need to eat. I need your energy levels up with what I have planned for you later," he groans as he lays a kiss upon my forehead and gently lowers me into my chair.
Pulling myself further in, I watch as he scurries around the table and takes a seat opposite me. The candles in front of us seem to light both our faces perfectly, the heat from the small flames only adding redness to my already rosy cheeks.
Reaching over, I grab his hand and smile brightly. A small coughing sound comes from behind me and I turn slowly to see a single waiter moving beside us.
"Appetisers, Madam. As requested by your friends," he states as he lays down a small platter of strawberries in front of us, pulling out a bottle of champagne from behind his back at the same time.
I want to thank him as he pours us both a glass, but all I can do is smile like a fool and watch the froth fill the glass right to very brim, before it settles back down.
"Congratulations to you both," he adds as he steps back, drops his head and walks away.
Ethan pushes the plate towards me and I quickly grab a strawberry with one hand whilst reaching for the champagne and holding it up on the middle of the table.
"To us," I grin brightly, my eyes totally focused on his as he lifts his own glass and holds it against mine, carefully.
"To you."
"To my husband." I beam.
"To my wife," he growls back, leaning forward with that glint in his eye.
"To our wedding!"
"To our future."
"To happiness."
"To babies.” He smirks and raises a brow.
"To not running before we can walk," I add, matching his raised brow.
"To always waking up next to each other."
"To never breaking promises."
"To lots of sex, every damn day," Ethan adds, his eyes narrowing seductively.
"To fulfilling dreams together."
"To sex. I said sex."
I can't help but giggle at the gorgeous, adorable look on his face. It's so nice to see him happy after what feels like such a long time. "To whatever makes you happy, baby."
"To your fine arse."
I press my lips together to control the laughter that suddenly wants to escape. Leaning closer, I push the strawberry against my lips, indulging in a slow, teasing bite before swallowing it down and licking my lips.
"To your arse," I retort.
"Fuck," he whispers, closing his eyes as he shuffles in his seat. "Izzy, I'm struggling enough as it is. If you tease me all the way through this meal, it's not going to last long."
I clink my glass against his, the sound pinging out around us before I straighten my back and tilt my head.
"To forever, Mr Walker."
His smile widens instantly. "To forever, Mrs Walker."
I have to take a moment to absorb the name as I sip my drink. I've hated my own for as long as I can remember, but now, I don't. It's an indescribable feeling. like I've finally found my home and where I should be. Where I've always been destined to be.
"To Scott," I finally breathe out. "The one man who we will never be able to raise enough glasses to."
I expect Ethan's head to drop in sadness, the same way it has done for the last week, every time his best friend’s name is mentioned. But instead, he squeezes his eyes tight together for just one moment as the smile grows wilder on his face and he exhales the words out slowly.
"To Scott. I love you, mate. Always have, always will. I told you I'd marry her."
My eyes instantly fill with blinding tears, but Ethan's hand squeezes mine reassuringly the second his eyes pop open and something that stares back at me tells me it's okay for us to enjoy this moment we have in front of us. Something tells me we haven't to dwell. We have to enjoy. So that's what we do.
The magic of the evening just seems to grow. It feels like Paris and Joel have ordered us a million courses as we drink our way through bottle after bottle of champagne. Our conversation stays light the whole way through. I'm like a giddy school girl that's finally managed to land a date with the hottie of the year. I'm giggly. I'm shy at times. I'm embarrassed, but more comfortable than I've ever been. I'm going all out to make him smile, even though deep down I know that all I have to do is sit here and just... be. It's the most amazing feeling I've ever experienced in my whole entire life.
I politely hold my hand up to the waiter to indicate that if he so much as puts another ounce of food in front of me, I won't be responsible for throwing up in front of him. His shy smile makes my heart warm as he excuses himself and retreats from the both of us.
"Ethan, do you think the guys back home will be mad?" I ask cautiously. "About us marrying away from them all, I mean."
"You think they will be mad with us for making ourselves the happiest we have ever been and doing something for us instead of everyone else for once?" Ethan speaks quietly, his cheek leaning against his palm lazily, his eyes dancing under his long lashes as he peeks up at me whilst his free hand lightly air pianos on the table surface.
"I just don't want to let anyone down," I whisper.
"Izzy, stop it."
I blink rapidly as my thoughts turn back to the friends that weren't here to witness this amazing night in our lives. I know deep down they won't be anything other than ecstatic for us, but a small part of me wishes they could have witnessed it.
"Dean?" I dare myself to ask, twisting my mouth as I look up.
"Dean will be glad he doesn't have to wipe the grease off of his grubby little hands and wear a suit," he laughs.
"Good point."
"Although he might be pissed he didn't get to do the whole stag party thing."
Smiling tightly, I push my arms against the edge of the table and stand. My hand hitches up one side of my long dress as I start to move towards Ethan. I'm no longer able to sit anywhere that isn't his lap. His body leans back in his chair as he watches me stalk towards him, his smile growing bigger as I fall onto his knees and wrap my arms around his neck.
"I'm kinda glad we skipped the trashy stag and hen parties. I'm glad we skipped it all. I didn't want a wedding."
His arms circle around me as he pulls me tighter and nuzzles himself into my neck. "You wanted a marriage."
"I just want you. Any way I can have you."
"The feeling is more than mutual."
I run a hand through his hair before slowly lifting his chin and landing a soft kiss upon his warm lips.
"Mine."
His smile never fades as he pulls me even tighter and drags his flat palms all the way from my shoulders, down my lower back, and lands them on my arse, squeezing firmly. "Mine."
"Have I told you that I love you yet, today?"
"Hmmm. I'm not sure you have." He grins, delicately placing two small kisses on the tops of the exposed parts of my breasts.
"Damn. I'm such a bad wife already."
"The worst.” He groans against my skin, nudging himself closer. "I'm going to have to be strict with you to keep you on track."
"Buy me a guidebook or something."
"Step by step lessons. Every day."
"Starting in the bedroom, I'm guessing?" I move my body around and straddle his hips, grateful that my dress allows me the freedom to move however I want. My hands clasp around his neck and once again I'm lost in his eyes. I'm always lost in them.
"Hell no. I don't want a wife in the bedroom," he breathes, dropping his head back whilst his hands circle my behind.
"You don't?"
"No. I'll always want the girl who broke into my apartment to make love to me for the first time to be the girl that's waiting for me in our bed."
"We didn't make love that day," I remind him cheekily.
"Exactly my point," he growls and rotates his hips beneath me.
"You're such a horn dog."
"Only with you," he says through a strained voice as he grips me tighter and begins to stand, lifting us both upright as my legs wrap around his waist and he turns us in a slow circle on the sand.
The music still rings out around us. I don't even know the tune anymore. I couldn't care less. All I care about is being in Ethan's arms. I never want to let go.
"Dance with me?" he asks seductively as he sways me slowly from side to side.
"I already am." I grin down on him.
"No. Properly. As my wife."
My brow creases together as my forehead drops to his before I slowly unravel my legs and slide down against his chest. Ethan never wants to dance, but the look in his eyes right now tells me he wants it more than anything else.
"Okay," I whisper, grabbing his hand in mine whilst placing my other on his chest.
"Don't look so worried."
"I'm not... But you have a weird habit of unveiling hidden talents when I least expect them. I'm just waiting for you to tell me you want us to do a Viennese Waltz." I smile up at him and cringe. "I'm more of a MC Hammer kind of girl."
Ethan's laughter rocks both our bodies before he lifts his arm and spins me beneath it slowly. "I was
thinking more of a rumba?"
He quickly pulls me back against his chest, pressing himself to me so there's not enough room for even air to pass through.
"Hmmm. Rumba. Is that a drink? I'm sure I've heard Paris mention that before."
His finger lifts my chin and our eyes lock together. "Izzy?"
"Yeah?"
"Shhhh."
"O--" The full word doesn't get chance to leave my mouth before his lips have claimed me in a slow, soft, totally knee trembling kiss. When we eventually pull away, he carefully places my head against his chest, runs his fingers through my hair and then... We dance.
And it's perfect.
I'm not sure how long we stand there for. Our feet pad against the sand, our movements so small it probably doesn't even qualify as actual dancing, but it's enough for us. I'm in my husband’s arms.
He's in mine. There's nothing between us. No space, no people, no outside world, no noise. Just us.
Somewhere in the moment, I close my eyes and nuzzle further into his chest, just to inhale his all too familiar scent, my exhale leaving my mouth much louder than I intend it to. The perfection of the moment is almost too much for me to comprehend.
I could die tomorrow knowing I achieved the ultimate high in life. Nothing will ever top this day. Nothing at all can come close to this feeling.
My arms squeeze him tighter and my breathing gets heavier. Ethan's lips press against my hair for the thousandth time.
"You're getting heavy in my arms. Just like you do in bed. Are you tired?"
"No," I breathe out, sounding more exhausted than I ever have.
I feel him smile against my head before his knees bend, his arm wraps beneath my legs and he scoops me up in to his arms.
"I think it's time for us to make this day even more perfect," he whispers in my ear.
I don't need to respond. The slow grin that creeps on my face tells him everything he needs to know.
Straightening his back, Ethan takes a deep breath and growls softly.
"God, I fucking love you, Izzy."
"I fucking love you too, Ethan."
And then his feet begin to move, his muscles tensing as he carries me over the sand and back into the world of other people. My whole body comes to life at the thought of how this day is actually going to end. I need to be closer to him. So much closer. I want our naked skin to come together. I want and need him inside me more than I ever have done before.
As his feet begin to pick up pace and his own impatience becomes more apparent, I allow a small shiver of excitement to run through me and bury my face into his neck. My teeth gently nip at his skin just to try and find a way... Any way to taste him and feel him on my lips.
Before I know it, he's practically running up the stairs.
I have a feeling my wait is almost over.
And I'm pretty sure it should be illegal to feel this damn good.
Ethan
Part Eight
I couldn't seem to get up the stairs fast enough, then I got turned around and headed in the wrong direction, heading straight for our old room. It was only Izzy dangling the key card to the honeymoon suit, kicked back in my arms giggling, that reminded me. Bumping her in my arms and making her squeal, I stopped and pressed my lips against hers urgently. If I didn't get to the room soon, I was going to end up having her against the wall.
In my arms, her dress had become loose at the top, giving me a great view of the girls. I had to divert my eyes in order to get motivated enough to move again.
"Where the hell are you going?"
"Fucked if I know, I keep getting distracted by my wife's boobs."
"Your wife's boobs, huh?"
"She's got a gorgeous set of tits on her!"
"How gentlemanly of you! Good job you’re carrying me. My knees may have buckled." She snorted, raising herself in my arms and kissing my neck. "Take a left here."
I took the left and let out a growl of appreciation when I saw the door at the end of the hall, the number held within a hibiscus wreath shaped like a heart. It had to be the right one.
Bending my knees, I kept my grip on her tight as she leaned toward the door, shoving the key in the lock and waiting for the green light before pushing it open an inch.
"You know, I could get used to you carrying me around. Would you still love me if I asked you to do it every day?"
"If it made you happy..." I scrunched up my nose. "I'll buy you a wheelchair."
"But that wouldn't make me happy."
"Well, I never plan on leaving our marital bed, so it's a non issue."
Tapping her chin with her index finger, she shot me a grin that only made me want her more. "I like this plan much better. Proceed."
Shaking my head and chuckling, I kicked the door open with my foot and carried my bride over the threshold, humming the wedding march. For a full minute, I didn't take in my surroundings. I was too enamoured with my wife and the way she was meeting my gaze. She averted her eyes first, but her gasp had mine following.
The room was gorgeous, if not a little extravagant. A wall of windows faced the bed, all of them open, leaving a soft breeze to push the curtains dancing into the room. The high ceiling had beams running the length of it, while the small balcony overlooked the beach where we'd been married. Everything was white washed but it was beautiful.
As much as I enjoyed checking out our surroundings. There was something exponentially more beautiful in my arms. Breathing her in, I set her on her feet, taking her hands in mine as she took in the room around her.
"It's beautiful."
"It is, but it's nothing compared to the way you looked today."
That got her attention. With wide eyes, she looked back at me, capturing mine in the pools of blue that I was lucky enough to drown in for the rest of my life.
Stood facing one another, we just stared. The room was the perfect setting, the atmosphere practically crackled with the sexual tension between the two of us. The dim lighting caught the gold in her hair as I finally released her hands and swept it over her shoulder, exposing her neck to me. I had to fight the compulsion to just strip her bare and take her. She was my wife and I wanted this first encounter as man and wife to be savoured, which meant undressing her like the gift she was.
Taking a step closer, I ran the backs of my fingers along her jaw, my thumb and index finger closing around her chin to tilt her head up to meet mine. My lips brushed against hers as I took my time, mentally taking note of the softness of her lips and the gentle sigh she emitted as my fingers trailed down her neck and bare shoulder. We'd been together for a while, and sexually we were indulgent, but this felt so new, so exquisite. It was like rediscovering everything I loved about her.
"Ethan..." She whispered my name reverently as her long lashes brushed her cheeks, her hands landing tentatively on my hips. I was teasing her with this slow sensuality, when I knew she expected the animal in me to come forward. I could hear the need in her voice. It matched the aching that ran through me; the ache to bury myself in her roughly and be home.
Deepening our kiss, I let the pads of my fingers trail over her shoulders, the satin soft skin warm even against the heated arousal of my own. The friction from the rise and fall of her chest against mine had need taking over the want and I was unable to stop myself. I fought the knot at the back of her neck that held the dress together, releasing the two ends of material, letting them fall as I took a step back, forcing myself to break the kiss so I could take her in.
The dress had fallen free and gathered at her waist where a small belt held it in place. I was mesmerized by the rise and fall of her chest as she dragged air in, her wide blue eyes staring at me expectantly.
"You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen."
"Ethan!"
"What? I want to enjoy looking at my wife."
Her mouth fell open as though she was longing to respond but decided against it. Her swollen lips looked edible after the kiss we'd shared, and I more than planned on making it worse before I let them get better. First, I wanted to explore her.
Leading her to the bed, I lowered myself to my knees, my hand tugging on hers to sit her on the edge as I settled myself between her thighs. My eyes never left the dark pink of her erect nipples as I shuffled closer. I wanted so badly to just lean forward and take them in my mouth. Nip and suck at them until she moaned my name. Dragging it out, however, I knew her reaction would be more explosive. So I took my time. My fingers fondled and explored, brushing the underside of her breasts lightly before circling her nipple and plucking lightly. The color deepened with her growing arousal, the skin taut when I finally leaned forward and closed my lips around them.
"Oh, God!"
My lips curled into a smile as my tongue flicked the tight skin, but it was followed by a groan of my own as her hands buried themselves in my hair, holding me to her. She always knew exactly which spot drove me crazy, her stubby nails sending shivers down my spine.
My fingers pinched and teased the nipple I'd neglected with my mouth, and her hips shifted gently with need as her head fell back, pushing her breasts closer to me. Much longer and I wouldn't be able to stop myself from slamming into her. Every elevated breath and mewl of pleasure only seemed to make my dick grow a mind of its own. My hips were already rocking without permission.
I wanted to explore every inch of her skin over and over again, until all I could taste was myself on her. She was mine. My wife.
That word. That one little word was like petrol to an open flame. The very word that once made me go soft, now had me rock hard as my hands moved to where her belt was tied around her waist. I fumbled with the damn thing until frustration and need pulled my eyes down to it. Smooth, Ethan!
"Get that pretty arse up for me."
With flushed cheeks, her hands fell from my hair and to the bed either side of her as she lifted herself from the mattress. I wasted no time in stripping the dress from her, and I made sure I brought her underwear with it, exposing her to me completely.
"You're overdressed, Walker," she said breathlessly, her eyes sparkling with mischief and arousal.
"Is that right?"
"Yup." Her arse landed on the bed as her eyes moved down my chest. She wasted no time in lifting her foot and rubbing it up my thigh with a purr. My answering growl let her know just how close I was to losing what little control I had in that moment.
One hand moved to the neck of my shirt, pulling it over my head and dropping it to the growing pile beside me. We had all night to make love and explore. Her foot was creeping toward my dick, her toe stroking the head of it through my shorts. There was no way in hell I could hold off any longer. I don't know if she knew the power she had over me, but in that moment, I didn't care. I just wanted her. I wanted to consummate our marriage in the most feral way possible and I knew she saw the change in me.
Crab crawling to the middle of the bed, her eyes roamed my bare chest. There was no doubt in my mind that she wanted exactly what I did in that moment. That connection, that soul baring, incontrovertible moment where we became one.
Hand on my belt, I rose to my feet, teasing her with exaggerated movements. My smile was a permanent fixture, amplified by that little plastic ring on her left hand.
I crawled onto the bed in pursuit, chuckling as her foot came up against my shoulder, a weak attempt at restraint considering I could read her every movement like it was my own. Turning my head I nipped at her ankle and made her squeal, her heel sliding off my shoulder and over my back.
"Quite a position you've found yourself in, Mrs. Walker," I teased, crawling forward enough that my mouth was level with the apex of her thighs.
"Knobhead." She giggled, her heel sliding against my back trying to gain friction. Another squeal followed the first as I brought her other leg into the same position, leaving her completely at my mercy.
Bending my arms, I pushed my tongue over her clit, and blew a stream of cold air over the dampness. I groaned out, pressing my lips against the tender spot as her heels pushed into my back, her hips rising from the bed in a silent plea for more. I could already see she was ready for me. I could feel the tension in her body and the wet heat against my tongue as I dipped it inside her, just to hear my name fall from her lips the way it always did when I teased her like this. Our playfulness had primed her perfectly and I was more than willing to take advantage of that.
Rising up, I pushed forward, crawling up her body as my eyes drank in every perfect curve that belonged to her. Her legs, still on my shoulders, curled her forward, her body bowed. I met her eyes and smiled down at her through her legs, my dick teasing her labia as I rocked my hips against her.
"What do you want, baby?"
"You!"
I smiled brighter, rocking my hips again, refusing to give us both what we wanted until I had the answer I needed.
"You have me." I kissed her knee hooked over my shoulder, my arms trembling with the need to slam into her. "What do you want?"
"I..." She flushed, her cheeks pink with arousal. "Fuck me, Ethan."
I didn't give her a chance to catch her breath as my name died on her lips. I thrust into her, our pelvic bones meeting with breathless groans and moans that mingled between us. Pausing for just a moment, I watched her take it all in. Her head was thrown back, exposing her neck to me, her eyes widening and fluttering closed, her lips parting, teeth sinking into the flesh there. For a second, it occurred to me that I was the only man that would ever have her like this for the rest of our lives.
The thought echoed in my head, creating a wave through my body that had my hips rocking back and slamming against her. I kept it slow and hard, her body clenching around mine telling me just how close she was. With the angle of her body, I slammed against her g-spot with every thrust until my hips pushed against hers.
I would never get enough of her. Feeling her body against mine, accepting me, loving me, it would always call me in for more. Pushing deeper, harder and faster, I gave her what we both needed. My breath sawed in and out, sweat gathering between my shoulder blades, and the slap of our bodies coming together all faded out the moment her eyes flickered open and met mine.
All I could see was her. All I could feel was her. All I could hear was her. Her eyes went wide the moment before she climaxed. Every ounce of love and emotion were visible in that one quantifiable moment. It was just her and I. For just a blink of an eye that was all that mattered in the world.
I felt her tighten around me, her eyes closing as the rapture took control. The moment her heels dug into my shoulder blades, I followed, the immense pleasure shooting down my spine forcing my hips flush against her deeply as I let go, her name reverently falling from my lips like a prayer.
Izzy... My wife. My heart and soul. I'd known I would love being married to her, and I knew I would always want her, but this intensity, the complete feeling of right... I never wanted to let this go. It was her and I against the world.
Mr. and Mrs. Walker.
Damn if that didn't have a ring to it!
Damn if that didn't have a ring to it!
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